Not for me dear reader, but honestly (and I'm not trying to sound like the Princess of Pity here even though I admit I have my lower lip fully engaged in pout-mode) every female around me seems to be preggers.
Ok, so not every female around me is with child, but let me put it to you this way... anyone over 15 and under 50 seems to be pregnant.
Obviously that can't be true. But you know what it's like when you buy a new car? For example, if you bought a new red honda civic, all you would likely notice on the road are red honda civics.
Well honestly I have not bought a baby, but all I see are pregnant ladies. And babies. And strollers. And pacifiers. And yes, even diapers.
I'm not sure if this is a mind-over-matter thing, or if my body is screaming at me to get to work. Either way, it is leaving me with nothing but a deep longing in my heart and a pout on my face.
The business of baby-making is at least fun to try. Although it can be frustrating to no end.
For now I'm left to soothe myself by doing things that I love to do in my spare time. I have the honor of painting a mural in my friend's nursery, and I can't wait to start that project. I also have a baby shower coming up - and I love showers. I've already asked the hostess if she would consider handing out babies as the prizes, but no-go.
Thank God for the dog. While I've learned that she absolutely detests being dressed up (yes, she has a selection of sweaters and sadly I tried to put a frock on her once...), she is quite a sook and a wonderful companion, and she tolerates my baby language. I also tend to try to avoid stressing out my husband by talking about my baby clock, so she makes for a good audience. As long as I give her a nice bone to chew on, she'll listen to anything I have to say. That beats wearing a frock any day.
Sooo... I'm off to the mall today, where I'm sure to see legions of infants and kids. One thing I hate to see are the parents dragging along a child who look exasperated... if only they knew how much I'd give to trade places and have to deal with a whining, screaming child. Don't get me wrong: I do know that having a child is not all Anne Geddes or Mary Poppins moments, and that parenting requires people to walk the line between "oh my god I just turned into my mother", and being scared shitless.
I just long to be there. Bring me your dirty diapers, colic, and screaming temper tantrums, and I'll give you anything I have.
Do me a favor. If you are lucky enough to have a child, make sure you hug them today for me.
And for the love of God, if you see the stork.... send him my way.
Have you ever considered adopting or being foster parents? You sound like you would be wonderful with any child and there are many out there that need the loving stability of good parents. Of course you want your own and I do understand that, just thought I'd throw that in the mix.
ReplyDeleteHi Jeannette! The wait-list for adoptions here is 10 years... which renders me ineligible due to my age. And the foster-parent idea is a good one, EXCEPT there is no guarantee that you will get to keep the child - and I can only imagine how gut-wrenchingly disappointed I would be if I bonded with a child who was sent back home even if to good parents.
DeleteI meant to sat thank you for this when you posted it. I'm a new mom and it is overwhelming at times. Reading this made me realize (again) that I'm very lucky. And I did hug her for you. I pray that all goes well for you.
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